Santa the Shaman

Jack Heror, the author of "The Emperor wears no clothes" and legendary hemp activist claimed that Santa's root's can be traced back to ancient mushroom rituals in Sebria. (no pun intended) He had been working on a book for over 10 years documenting this, dieing before it could be finished. Here are some footnotes behind the theory.

Santa Claus dresses in red and white. The amanita muscari is red and white.

In Europe and Asia the images of the jolly old Elf are covered with spots, just as the mushroom is. 


When the ancient shamans would go out and harvest the "magical" mushroom, they would dress similar to Santa, wearing red and white fur-trimmed coats and long black boots.

When collecting the mushrooms, they would store them in a sac.


The locals would put them in stockings over the fireplace to dry them. Similar to the Christmas tradition of hanging stockings over the fireplace with goodies filled inside them.

Another method of drying them was to place them on the leaves of the tree to dry them in the sun. This looked very similar to ornaments on a Christmas tree.

One of the side effects of eating amanita muscari is that the skin and facial features take on a flushed, ruddy glow. This is why Santa is always shown with glowing red cheeks and nose.

Reindeer are known to eat the amanita muscaria mushroom. After ingesting this, they get really high and are known to run around the fields, galloping and prancing as if they were flying.

Santa's Reindeer have magic powers. The amanita muscari is referred to as the magic mushroom, referring to the "magic" powers
you acquire after digesting it.

Reindeer are native to Siberia, and the shamanic use of this mushroom is well documented in Siberia.

Sebria is close to the North Pole.  

Amanita muscaria grow under pine trees and have a mycorrhizal (a non-parasitic) relationship with the trees. Christmas trees are Pine trees.

When the mushrooms grown underneath the pine trees they look like little wrapped presents underneath the tree.

Santa has many elves that work for him and live among him in the North Pole. Elves and fairies are highly associated with the amanita muscari.

After the Shaman rituals were outlawed, locals were forced to sneak in with the bag of mushrooms. Similar to the legend of Saint Nick sneaking in through the chimney with his sac of goods at night.

Even Santa's jolly "Ho, ho, ho!" is the euphoric laugh of one who has indulged in the magic fungus.

 And after years of translation, relaying and commercialization, the original meaning becomes distorted, twisted and ultimately lost.

                                        Ho Ho Hollucinogen  
                                  Happy holidays and safe trips

        
                                       Want to learn more?
          Here are some other books that discuss this same concept.

                      Mushrooms and Mankind
                      Soma: Divine Mushroom of Immortality
                      Mushrooms, Poisons and Panaceas
                      When Santa was a Shaman:
                   Ancient Origins of Santa Claus and the Christmas tree

Is Boy George natures condom?

Nobody really knows what causes homosexuality. No "gay" gene has been discovered yet there have been a lot of studies that suggest it does lie within a person biology. We do know it's natural because we can observe it in the wild.  So what if homosexuality was an evolutionary development for population control. Heterosexuality was originally an evolutionary development from asexual species. 

The obvious problem is that evolution is about surviving and reproducing. So this would be anti evolution, unless it somehow helped the family as a whole.

Since gay relatives have no kids of there own, they could be very helpful in tending to relatives kids. A better teacher to student ratio increases the likeliness that that group will be successful and survive. Studies also show that female relatives of gay men tend to have more children than the average female. This suggests that women who carry the fertile gene, may also carry the homosexual gene. Since after generations of high fertility, it would be increasingly difficult to provide and tend to the growing families without such help. This is were a homosexual relative would be very useful. On the same note, a homosexual lack of offspring would  be very useful in reducing the extended family size. This could be a key to survival in many scenarios including the famine. Over population means less resources. Studies also explain that gay uncles tend to help out more than straight uncles. Ultimately it would be extremely beneficial if women who carried the high fertility gene also carried the gay gene.










With almost 7,000,000,000 people in the world, I say we roll out the rainbow carpet and welcome them.